Boys Will Be Boys

May 13, 2019
In this fierce, often sharp treatise, activist and author Ford (Fight Like a Girl) considers how patriarchy is harmful to men and reflects on how society can collectively educate boys on resisting the siren songs of male privilege and sexist attitudes. Having recently had a son, Ford has personal insight on how gender roles become prescribed at an early age—“boys are cars and touchdowns and arrows and rifles and guns”—and advises other parents on how to avoid the trap of these prescriptions (rule #1: no gender reveal parties). She notes the need for more female-centered stories in film and television and to teach boys that stories about girls are worth their attention; discusses societal attitudes about sex, which demonize girls for being sexually active and deride boys if they are deemed insufficiently sexually motivated; and carefully outlines exactly how one might have a conversation with a young man about sex, consent, and pornography. About halfway through the book, Ford zooms out to look more broadly at patriarchy and its discontents, including the misdeeds of murderous men’s rights activists, misogynist pickup artists, and Donald Trump. The analyses here may not be novel to readers already familiar with contemporary feminism, but this could serve as a useful entry point for those newer to the topic or contemplating how to parent in light of it.

June 15, 2019
A noted Australian feminist writer, activist, and "troll agitator" offers her take on the culture of toxic masculinity. In her latest, Ford (Fight Like a Girl, 2018) analyzes patriarchy and, in particular, "how the systems we live in allow men to get away with doing deeply shitty things." She begins by examining the behaviors that "codify male power and dominance...[and] secure protection" from the consequences of those behaviors. She traces the genesis of toxic masculinity to the cultural penchant for forcing young boys to accept the rigid ways of being that disallow them to express emotions or preferences for "girlish" things like dresses and dolls. The more boys see the males and females around them assuming equal roles in both the private and public spheres, the less likely they will feel entitled to tell women their place is at home taking care of men. The fewer stories they see in books, film, and online that "reinforce regressive stereotypes," the less chance boys will develop the inflated sense of social entitlement Ford sees as being at the heart of toxic masculinity. She argues that rather than glorify male violence, society must teach boys the importance of communicating with and respecting the vulnerability in each other and in women. Ford also considers the online "manosphere" backlash against female empowerment, which includes men's rights activism that sees feminism as a "social cancer." The author then delves into the various frightening manifestations of rape culture. Normalized through the sanction of powerful men like Donald Trump, it paints women as provocateurs responsible for all acts of male sexual aggression they might suffer. Ford's book, which draws on current events in Australia, the U.K., and the U.S. as well as her own life as a wife and mother of a son, launches yet another furious and necessary salvo at the gender status quo while offering a blueprint for a more enlightened world. A witty polemic with significant contemporary value.

COPYRIGHT(2019) Kirkus Reviews, ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

Starred review from August 1, 2019

Ford follows up her powerful book Fight Like a Girl with a much-needed, unapologetic study of toxic masculinity that relentlessly excavates how complicit we all are in the creation, reinforcement, and perpetuation of a "boys will be boys" mind-set. As the author explains, this ideology may sound humorous but is, in fact, detrimental to society as a whole. This latest work begins with an analysis of Ford's experiences with her own son and ends with a catalog of men who have been accused of--and forgiven for--acts of sexual violence in a way that is simultaneously intimate and systemic. This will change the way readers think about seemingly innocuous habits that enable toxic masculinity. Although some readers may resist Ford's bold, brash tone, she writes with clarity about how "manhood is never seen as an identity marker, particularly when it comes to leadership," and with love for her son in a powerful epilog that few will be able not to feel her anger and wish to enact some kind of change. VERDICT A necessary read that compliments Ford's first book, but ultimately stands on its own.--Emily Bowles, Univ. of Wisconsin, Madison

Copyright 2019 Library Journal, LLC Used with permission.

Starred review from June 1, 2019
In this fiery tome, Australian agitator Ford succeeds her meditation on female oppression, Fight like a Girl (2018). Whereas that book sought to empower women to reach beyond traditional expectations of femininity, this one encourages men to fight against the social trap of toxic masculinity. Ford begins and ends the book by addressing her toddler son, whom she hopes will enjoy gentle, expressive, and emotional gender identity in his life, against all social odds. A timely cultural critic, she dissects events as recent as the Senate confirmation hearings of Supreme Court Justice Brett Kavanaugh. Ford unpacks how male-produced porn creates a warped understanding of sex for boys and teens; the effect that speakers like Milo Yiannopoulos and Alex Jones have on the psyche of conservatives; how Men's Rights Activists find community and all too often resort to violence; and how the justice system consistently favors male perpetrators over female victims. Toward the end, Ford includes an extensive list of men outed as abusers in the wake of the #MeToo movement, a helpful compilation for a world that forgets and forgives the disgraces of powerful men. Ford is intelligent, thoughtful, well-researched, and witty, but most importantly, she is hopeful for a future of justice and equality.(Reprinted with permission of Booklist, copyright 2019, American Library Association.)